Daily Mindset Magic To Shift You From Lack To Abundance | Podcast Recap | Episode 24

Hayley Scott Summers
Dec 1
14 min read

Podcast Recap from Mindset, Mess & Magic, Episode 24

Hello, welcome back to Mindset, Mess and Magic. I’m your host, Hayley Scott Summers, and as always, I am so happy that you’re here.

Recently, somebody asked me why I called my podcast Mindset, Mess & Magic. Not in a confrontational “why on earth would you do that?” kind of way, but in a genuinely curious way.

And honestly… firstly, who doesn’t love a bit of alliteration? I’m absolutely here for that.

But on a deeper level, the reason I’ve called the podcast Mindset, Mess & Magic is because I am a big believer in being able to create magic from mess - from your most difficult seasons, your trickiest situations, those foundations of adversity you might have grown up with, or the challenges that blindsided you later in life.

I genuinely believe every single one of us has the potential inside of us to create something more for ourselves, regardless of where we’ve come from or what we think is going to hold us back. And a huge part of that is your mindset.

In fact, I’d go as far as to say mindset is the cornerstone. It’s the foundation. It’s the everything. If you can get your mindset on point, you can change the trajectory of your life.

You can turn those messy situations into something that is pure fucking magic - for you, for your family, for future generations. You can break patterns. You can interrupt trauma that has been passed down. You have the capacity to do that. And it starts with your mind.

My Story: From Turbulent Foundations to a New Identity

I’ve been thinking about this a lot recently because my daughter, Phoebe (Phoebe Bee), has just moved out. She’s starting this brand new chapter in her life as a single mum with her baby, Devon.

Watching her has taken me right back to almost 20 years ago, when I became a single mum at 21. I keep asking myself:

What really changed for me? What were the mindset shifts that turned me into the woman I am today?

Because I did not come from a place of privilege.

I had a turbulent childhood. We moved around constantly. I missed a lot of school. I didn’t have a great education. I can’t even tell you how many primary schools I went to. I could probably count my secondary schools on one hand, but primary schools? We were always on the move.

I also grew up in a religion called the Jehovah’s Witnesses, which I’ve spoken about very tentatively over the years. I’m still learning to speak honestly about it, because there is a lot of programming in that organisation that leaves people who leave it feeling like they shouldn’t speak up. I am working through that, and I’m getting better at it.

One of the reasons I had to do so much mindset work when I became a single mother at 21 was because that particular rigid religion teaches that women are to be subservient to the head of the household - which is always a man.

Your husband. Your father. And in the “absence” of a man, it’s God.

And you are to be subservient to Him regardless.

So, as a young single woman, with very little education, who had missed a lot of school, my self-worth and my understanding of who I was and what I could create… were tiny.

My belief in what was possible for me was so far removed from who I am today that it genuinely feels like I’ve become an entirely new person.

I am so different from the young woman I was when I started that journey as a single mum 20 years ago.

And now I’m watching my daughter embark on that same journey with so much more love and support around her than I had access to. I feel so proud of the decisions she’s making for herself and her baby.

It’s been a wild journey. I’ve absolutely loved it. And it’s only just beginning.

But it’s really made me pause and ask:

What were the key mindset shifts that changed everything for me?

And, interestingly, they’re not only shifts I made back then — they are things I still use now.

Because let’s be honest: sometimes life is just a lot.

My schedule for the upcoming week, for example, is wild. It’s absolutely stacked. When I looked at it originally, I was like:

“Right, I have to be here at this time, then there, then everywhere… for everyone.”

And I felt stressed. I felt overwhelmed.

But then I had to check in with myself and go:

“Hang on a minute… so much of this is a fucking privilege.”

It’s actually really cool that I get to do these things for my business. It’s amazing that I get to support my partner. It’s beautiful that I have a family I get to love and nurture.

That one little mindset shift reminded me how important it is to work with your mind — because you have to do life anyway. There will always be things you have to do.

Even though I’m a big believer in curating a life with more freedom and alignment, there will still be life admin, responsibilities, and things that just need doing.

So today, I want to walk you through some of the mindset shifts that helped me move from lack to abundance — and that I still lean on now when I’m feeling overwhelmed, behind, or like I don’t have enough time, freedom, or progress.

This is not a step-by-step formula. I don’t believe in “one size fits all”. These are invitations. Tools. Ideas you can play with.

My hope is that at least one of them will resonate deeply and help you feel more abundant, right where you are.

Why “One Size Fits All” Advice Doesn’t Really Work

We live in a world where social media is full of things like:

“5 steps to 10K months”
“3 hacks to change your life”
“The exact blueprint you need”

And honestly… we don’t really work like that.

We’re all so different. We have different backgrounds, needs, nervous systems, responsibilities, and desires. You can follow someone else’s formula to the letter and it still might not work for you — not because you’re broken, but because you’re not them.

So as I share these mindset shifts, I want you to play with them. Try them on. Adjust them. See how they land for you.

You’re the expert of your own life. These are the tools that have worked for me — and I’m confident there will be at least one that meets you exactly where you are.

Mindset Shift #1: The Power of “Yet”

This one is deceptively simple. It’s called the power of yet.

I discovered it around the time I first started showing up online in the coaching/writing/speaking space. Before that, all of my businesses were built around a product or service that sat in front of me. I could hide behind it.

Hiding Behind Products vs. Being the Face

My first ever business was painting Warhammer miniatures professionally. That was a real thing.

I remember my daughter was about four when I started. It was so much easier for me, especially as someone who didn’t have much self-confidence or self-worth, to sell something I’d created rather than put myself out there.

I wasn’t the face of it. The miniatures were.

After that, I was a documentary wedding photographer for almost ten years. I loved that business so much. When I first started, it felt like I had found the thing I was going to do forever.

The joy it brought me was incredible.

But again, it was a product-based business. I took photographs, edited them, and put them out into the world. Clients hired me on the basis of my work, not my personal story.

Then came coaching.

Suddenly I wasn’t hiding behind a lens or a paintbrush. I had to show up as me. My face. My voice. My stories. My experiences.

I had to:

Speak on camera
Post online
Share vulnerable, personal stuff
Eventually speak at events

And at first, it felt impossible. I was swimming in “I don’t know how…”

“I don’t know how to show up online.”

“I don’t know what to say.”

“I don’t know how to find my ideal client.”

“I don’t know how to start a blog.”

Adding One Tiny Word

Then, somewhere, I stumbled across this idea:

👉 Add the word “yet”.

Instead of:

“I don’t know how to do this.”

You say:

“I don’t know how to do this yet.”

It sounds ridiculously simple, right? But it was a game-changer.

All of a sudden, “I can’t” became “I can’t yet”.

“I don’t know how to build a website… yet.”
“I haven’t found my ideal client… yet.”
“I haven’t hit that goal… yet.”

It takes you out of a fixed mindset and opens a door.

Why “Yet” Opens Up Your Brain

From an energetic point of view, “yet” expands your horizons. You move from a dead end to a work-in-progress.

And from a brain science point of view (even if I can’t quote every study), I’m pretty sure something is happening with your reticular activating system (RAS) — the little filter in your brain that decides what information is important.

Your RAS filters what you notice, because if you tried to consciously process everything coming at you all day, you’d lose your mind.

So when you say:

“I don’t know how to do this yet…”

You’re planting a seed. You’re telling your brain:

“This matters to me. Keep an eye out for solutions.”

So when you scroll past a post, or a free guide, or a coach, or a YouTube video that could genuinely help you, you’re more likely to notice it instead of dismissing it.

You become more receptive to answers.

You don’t shut the door on yourself.

And yes, I have absolutely become that annoying friend/coach who, when someone says “I don’t know how,” I just say:

“Yet.”

It’s often met with a confused look… and then a lightbulb:

“Oh. Yeah. I guess I don’t know how yet.”

Try it. The power of yet is such a simple way to move from lack to possibility.

Mindset Shift #2: Flip “I Have To” into “I Get To”

The next shift is what I call flipping the script.

This one is about changing “I have to” into “I get to”.

Questioning What You “Have” to Do

We tell ourselves we have to do so many things:

“I have to cook dinner.”
“I have to clean the house.”
“I have to go to this appointment.”

Sometimes, yes, there are real responsibilities. But a lot of the time, we don’t even stop to question these thoughts. We get stuck in a loop and never ask:

“Do I actually have to do this… or is there another way?”

For example, you’ve been working non-stop, looking after your family, doing all the things, and it’s 8pm on a Friday night. You’re exhausted and you hear yourself think:

“I have to cook dinner.”

Do you? Really?

Or could you:

Throw together picnic plates with whatever’s in the fridge
Order a takeaway if you have the capacity
Delegate, or simplify, or choose something far less labour-intensive

Sometimes, the pressure we feel is self-created.

You Don’t

Have

To — You

Want

When my daughter was heavily pregnant, my schedule was getting squeezed from all sides. Between the restaurant, the coaching, the podcast, our family, and preparing to support her as a single mum, things were intense.

I kept saying to myself:

“I have to go to this appointment.”

“I have to be there for this.”

“I have to show up for that.”

And then I caught it.

No, I didn’t actually have to do all of that. No one would arrest me if I didn’t go to every appointment.

But when I asked myself:

“Do you want to show up for your daughter like this?”

The answer was an immediate, tear-filled yes.

I want to be a present mum.

I want to be a present grandmother.

I want to break generational patterns and create healing by doing things differently than my parents did.

So no, I don’t have to.

But I get to.

And I want to.

That simple shift brought me back into alignment with my values instead of swimming in resentment.

“I Get To” Is an Abundance Practice

Here’s why this matters for abundance:

When you shift from “I have to” to “I get to”, you start to see how abundant your life actually is.

You get to cook dinner because you have food in the cupboard or the money to buy it.
You get to show up for your family because you have a family to show up for.
You get to drive to appointments because you have access to healthcare, or support, or opportunities.

Is it always easy? No.

Does it always feel like a privilege when you’re exhausted? Also no.

But in those moments where you feel drained, stuck, or resentful, try playing with:

“I get to do this.”

And remember: there are people out there who would love to trade places with you for exactly the thing you’re frustrated about.

Mindset Shift #3: Gratitude (But Not for Crumbs)

Let’s talk about gratitude.

I know it’s one of those words that gets thrown around so much it almost loses its meaning.

Gratitude lists.
Gratitude journals.
“Write 10 things you’re grateful for every day.”

It’s everywhere. But I also believe it’s one of the most under-utilised tools we have for shifting from lack to abundance.

Not the “Be Grateful for Scraps” Version

When I talk about gratitude, I’m not talking about the toxic “you should just be grateful” energy that some of us grew up with.

You might remember being told:

“You should just be grateful for what you have.”

And yes, of course, there’s truth in that — having gratitude is powerful. But when that message is used to keep you small or quiet or accepting scraps, it becomes damaging.

I grew up grateful for scraps.

That absolutely bled into:

How I allowed myself to be treated
The boundaries I did (or didn’t) have
The relationships I tolerated

“Just be grateful” translated into “Don’t ask for more.”

Now, I see gratitude differently.

You are absolutely allowed to say:

“I am so happy and grateful for everything I have… and I would like more, please.”

There is nothing wrong with that. In fact, I encourage it.

Gratitude as an Amplifier

Gratitude is an amplifier.

When you sit in gratitude for what you have:

Your home
Your relationships
Your health
Your food
Your creative ideas
Your opportunities

…you raise your energetic frequency.

If you meet someone who walks through the world with genuine joy, I would put money on the fact that they are a deeply grateful person.

They notice the small things.

They appreciate what they have.

And because of that, they naturally attract more of what they want.

Gratitude doesn’t mean settling.

It means saying:

“Thank you so much for all of this.

I love it.

And I’m open to more.”

That, to me, is abundance.

So no — don’t be grateful for crumbs.

Be grateful as fuck for the good in your life… and still reach for more.

Mindset Shift #4: Future Casting & Being Grateful for What’s Yet to Come

This next one is one of my absolute favourites because it’s playful and creative: future casting.

This is where you practice gratitude for things you don’t have yet — the things that are on their way to you.

I did this subconsciously for years without realising it. Now, I do it intentionally.

What Is Future Casting?

Future casting is basically:

Getting clear on what you desire
Imagining future you living that reality
And saying: “Thank you.”

It’s being grateful in advance.

Let’s say you’re feeling lack in a certain area:

Money
Love
Your business
Your career
A creative project

Instead of obsessing over what isn’t there yet, you ask:

“What do I actually want here?”

Then you start saying things like:

“I am so happy and grateful that my future self has a thriving business.”

“I am so happy and grateful that I’m working in my dream mechanic’s yard / nail salon / studio / restaurant / creative space.”

“I am so happy and grateful that my work impacts people all over the world.”

You act as if future you has already received it, and you sit in the feeling of that.

Faith vs. Fear

Both faith and fear require you to believe in something you can’t see yet.

Fear imagines the worst-case scenario and believes it.
Faith imagines the best-case scenario and believes it.

Either way, you’re believing in something that isn’t currently in front of you.

So you might as well choose wisely.

When I future cast, I’ll say things like:

“I am so happy and grateful that I’m a bestselling author.”

“I am so happy and grateful that my work positively impacts women all over the globe.”

“I am so happy and grateful for all the experiences that led me here, even the messy ones.”

Sitting here, in a little village called Caxton, above our restaurant, talking into a microphone that nobody might ever listen to… those dreams feel far away sometimes.

But I can still be grateful for them now.

I can still feel abundant now.

I get to live every day with those dreams in my heart, and that, to me, is abundance.

Mindset Shift #5: Perspective & Living in the Now

This last one might sound like common sense, but we all forget it: living in the now.

Every so often, something happens that snaps our perspective into place:

A song
A scene in a movie
A conversation
A piece of news
Someone else’s story

And for a moment, we remember how fragile, precious, and wild it is that we’re even here.

Looking Up at the Stars

We live in the countryside, not far from Cambridge. At night, when the sky is clear and you can see all the stars, I always look up and think:

“Holy shit. This is wild.”

Everything is so vast. We are these tiny little dots, in a tiny little sliver of time, in this huge, incomprehensible universe.

We get this one brief blip — this one human life.

And in those moments, I feel overwhelmingly grateful just to exist.

To breathe.

To love.

To get another day.

That, to me, is pure abundance.

Remembering What Really Matters

So when I’m feeling lack — when something hasn’t happened yet, when a goal feels far away, when I’m frustrated — I try to remember:

I’m alive.
My family is here.
We have this day.

Often, we only tap into that perspective when something bad happens. Something shocking. Something that shakes us.

And in those moments, we suddenly feel flooded with gratitude for what we have.

But imagine if we could access that feeling more often without needing a crisis to remind us.

I’m not saying you have to bypass your feelings or pretend everything is fine when it isn’t. I’ve had my fair share of rock-bottom seasons, and when you’re in them, gratitude can feel like a stretch.

But even then — even in the mess — there can be tiny, fleeting moments of:

“I’m still here.”
“I get another day.”
“I get another chance to try again.”

And that is abundance.

Bringing It All Together: From Lack to Abundance

These are just a handful of simple tools that have fundamentally changed my mindset, and as a result, changed my life:

The Power of Yet – shifting from “I can’t” to “I can’t yet.”
Flipping the Script – turning “I have to” into “I get to.”
Gratitude (Not for Crumbs) – deeply appreciating what you have while still allowing yourself to want more.
Future Casting – being grateful in advance for the things that are on their way to you.
Perspective & Presence – remembering how wild it is that we’re even here and letting that shape how you move through the world.

Because of these mindset shifts:

My expectations are different.
My goals are bigger, juicier, more aligned.
My life feels more vibrant, electric, and expansive.

I no longer believe that love, joy, and success are reserved for some select chosen few.

I believe they are available to all of us.

Myself included.

And you, too.

We can’t always control our circumstances, but we can influence the mindset we meet them with.

If you can cultivate a mindset of abundance — even gently, even imperfectly — you will open yourself up to more love, more joy, more peace, and more possibility.

Abundance is not something you go out and find.

Abundance is something you tap into inside yourself.

And from there, you can create real magic, regardless of what mess you’re navigating now or have navigated in the past.

If This Resonated…

As always, it is such an honour to spend this time with you.

If something in this landed for you, it would mean the world if you:

Left a review for the podcast (it really helps future listeners decide whether to tune in)
Shared this episode or blog with a friend who needs a reminder that abundance is available to them
Messaged me on social media – I’m over on Instagram at @hayleyscottsummers and I love hearing your takeaways

Thank you so much for being here.

I hope you have a wonderful week.

I’ll see you next time on Mindset, Mess & Magic. ✨